YOUR CHILDREN NEEDS YOU.
“Train up a child in the way it should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it” Proverb 22:6
Thank you for opening this site.
For you to still be reading this message now is because I believe the Spirit of God is speaking to you and if you agree with what you are reading kindly call some of your friends to open the page and read also.
This message I believe should be read by all ESPECIALLY my African brothers living in Europe.
The word of God for us who believe the Bible to be the infallible word of God teaches fathers to train their children in the way they are to go.
To train means, to equip or disciple your children.
The question then is how can you equip or disciple a child in a way he or she is to go when you don’t know the way your child is to go as a father.
As a result of not knowing the way God wants your child to go, some fathers either ignore the equipping or disciple programme or gave it to someone who will do the job poorly. At times, some have left the job completely to their wives.
Thank God for mothers but there is a place for mothers and there is a place for fathers.
Mothers are nurturers and they give wisdom while fathers give life and strength to their children.
Fathers are supposed to give vision and direction to their children. They are also to lead by example for their children to follow hence the issue of discipleship.
Disciples are those who are thought by impartation. What are you imparting to your children?
Life or death.
We are living at a time that stress is manifesting through individuals at an alarming rate and many times through lack of seeing dreams become reality, some are giving up on life and taking their venom of frustration on their children.
But wait a minute, because you did not get what you set out to achieve today does not mean that you are to lash out at everything that moves around you.
The word training does not mean you are to abuse your children.
You may say to yourself, how can I prepare my children for the future I never have?
My answer to that is that because you never had it does not mean that your children cannot have a beautiful, bright future.
Some of us from Africa came from a home where our fathers never had a bicycle but they sacrifice for us today to drive BMW, JAGUAR, MB, HONDA CVS etc….
I am challenging fathers to look ahead into 2010!
See greatness ahead of you and channel your children into it. They need you.
A man called Samson lost his sight to his enemies, but he cried to God to give him one more time opportunity to avenge himself against his enemies and God answered him by restoring his anointing. The Bible teaches us that Samson killed many at his death than while alive.
Fathers I pray for one more time anointing on you so that you can arise and see your children become the dream of greatness you once nurtured and in return see your enemies flee.
Now the major challenge facing parents now is the social services department.
My brothers please wake up!
These guys are not joking. They are out for kill if you will not obey the word of God.
I believe that a child equipped well or disciple effectively will not report his or her father to social services when disciplined. On the contrary, your discipline is a proof of your love.
Love exercise discipline.
Brothers, the way you were beaten, should not be repeated by you towards your children. Majority of our fathers never know how to show affection towards us.
Yes they sacrifice for us to have education (for those who have such fathers).
But for many of us, it was the affection and the warmth of our mothers that we know and thank God for that.
For some of us, our fathers were wonderful men. They not only sacrifice for our education they suffered family humiliation to stay loyal to our mothers and us their children.
The crunch of the matter is that, you cannot raise your children in Europe the way you were raised in Africa.
Some of the discipline given to us can be categorised as abuse (and if you will be truthful to yourself you hated it at that time too)
Please obey the word of God and enjoy the latter days of your life rather than grow with bitterness because the social services took your children away from you.
There must be a key to unlock the hearts of your children apart from a little slap on the face, electric wire on her back side, compulsory fasting while you are eating, African Koboko or painted stick ”Mr white”, keeping malice with your children for a week, tying the hands and feet on a spot for a while etc….
There are ways of Loving and Understanding your children. Being there for them not as absentee fathers, celebrating their achievements not criticising them all the time (I know you are always the first in the class during your time) giving them self worth, value and FINALLY LIVING BY GODLY EXAMPLE!
This goes a long way!
Look out for part 2 next week for the completion of the message and about mothers……….
To comment please click the topic ahead.
December 16th, 2009 at 1:22 pm
Thank you for this article Pastor
December 16th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Dear Pastor Lola,
Thank you for the article for fathers it really bless me and i pray that it will help fathers.
I look forward to mothers’ next week. Thank you May God bless you abundantly.
Min. Gbemi.
December 16th, 2009 at 2:23 pm
This is a sobering, insightful and awakening article for fathers in the diaspora for them to awake from their slumber and acknowledge the the dispensational, cultural, generational and spiritual realities in which we live in especially in the Western culture. Divine wisdom is required in this superimposition and clash of cultures that our children are faced with. And the only way to do that is by training them the way they should go as Scriptures command. But to achieve this, we ourselves as fathers need to be first trained up, chastened and led by the HOLY SPIRIT. Any father that is chastened by the HOLY SPIRIT, will himself chasten his children in the SPIRIT and not in the flesh!
I thank you Mama for modelling integrity and humility in your life, family and ministry, which is the sum total of righteousness, which produces Christ-like character and role-modelling for others like us. May the GOD of our LORD JESUS CHRIST, the FATHER of glory, continue to increase you in wisdom and in the knowledge of Him.
Your Son
Rev. Augustine
December 16th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
Thank you.
December 16th, 2009 at 2:54 pm
Thank you
December 16th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
God bless you Pator,i am really blessed by this message; looking forward to the completion next week. I pray that God continues to release the revelation knowledge of Christ in your life as HE orders your step each and every passing day to edify the saints for HIS glory.
Shalom.
December 16th, 2009 at 3:51 pm
What a well-balanced article. Long over-due.
Our black young boys/men appear to have a hard time in the UK.
Partly, because of lack an appropriate role model in the home.
Partly, because schools also fail to instill disciple and finally, the Church appears to be too scared to do much about this pandemic.
It is a world-wide phenomena.
A very high proportion of black homes are headed by single-parent mothers. Mothers do a great job.
It is not enough.
Children needs Fathers.
If GOD had intended a child to be brought up in lone parent house-holds, HE would have done so.
HE clearly wants both parents to nuture and ‘bring up a child the way it should go’.
A real sense of irresponsibilty amongst black men is now de rigueur!
Who are the children going to emulate?
Mothers have a different way of nuturing.
Both styles of nuturing will enhance a child’s sense of well being and worth.
The men are not taught how to be fathers.They do not know how to be fathers.
Therefore they cannot give/do what they don’t have.
The Church has to do more to end this catastrophe.
Yes it is the very future that is being undermined and eroded, just as the devil want.
We need collective prayers for GOD’s guidance on the way forward.
December 16th, 2009 at 3:56 pm
Thanks Pastor for talking about topics that most avoid…These are necessary to talk about…we need to be wise and obey the word of God to discipline our kids but also do it out of love…I have only just started this journey and I already understand being a parent is the hardest yet most rewarding job on earth. Please keep writing, i will be logging on to read your nuggets of wisdom because as my dad would say “knowledge is power”. God bless u for obeying God and writing..Emilie
December 16th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
Pastor may God continue to bless and prosper you and your family.
It is such a blessing reading this article.
This issue is real and there are many grown men and women who are still hurting today because they were rejected by there fathers or there father did not show them love and spend quality time with them.
I give God thanks daily for my dad and also my wonderful husband.
My dad stood the test of time by standing with my mum during hard times. He made saccrifices so that i was able to achieve what he didn’t. He has the opportunity to travel abroad for many years so that we could be happy and have proper education. He could have listen to his friends who forfit there famalies for what looked like greener pastures but he stood by us and now he is reaping the fruits of his labour. My dad is not able to do what he used to but his words of encouragement still rest in my heart.
Pastor thank you for highlighting this matter and my prayer is that men and fathers will arise and take there places in the lives of there children and also in the home.
God bless u Pastor as we await Article 2 on this issue.
December 16th, 2009 at 9:31 pm
Dear Pastor / Mum,
You couldn’t have said it better than this. You have hit the nail right on the head.
As men, we have learnt everything there is to learn about living successful lives, building empires, driving the latest motor or wearing the newest fashion on the high street but neglected the most and fundamental key issue; OUR children especially the SONS.
NO WONDER, 12yr & 11yr olds are having babies and the world applaudes [thru the media], black on black crime [young boys stabing and shooting each other] and the authorities seem less bothered, 90% of our young children raised up in foster homes [yet still suffering abuse of every nature], social services over loaded with case loads that they nolonger seem bothered about the welfare of some genuine cases in need of their help to the extend that they are now more concerned about targets set by the governing authorities; oh not forgetting the prisons that are filled with nearly 85% black brothers [of which 70% fathers, who they themselves were never fathered], there are more black people especially males [with a sharp rise in figures among young black teenagers] in pyschiatric and mental institutions.
Working in the Social services Industry has opened my eyes and exposed me to the naked truth about how the system is set against fathers. It all part of the task master’s agenda to fail homes, mess up our children, hence, a misguided, visionless fatherless generation that does what seems right in their own eyes.
It is so sad yet a real FACT that we as fathers have absconded from our duties.
You may be wondering why am saying ‘WE’. I am a father too and to an extent I don’t single myself out.
You were correct when you pointed out that the Social Services will bring up our children if we fail to do so. And guess what, the system is designed to destroy their spiritul, mental, emotional & physical ability to think God’s way. The only food the world has to offer our children is the food of the CHALDEANS just as in the days of Daniel.
This is not just a wake up call BUT God’s heart crying out to the FATHERS & His Church.
Your Book FULFILLING HIS DREAM speaks volumes to us fathers. I don’t see how we can do this [Fulfill His Dream], and yet that adversary the devil is destroying our seed right in our own back-yard because we failed to play our RIGHTFUL roles as FATHERS.
May we never be rejected before our Maker and Master because we were mindful of the things that didn’t concern HIM.
Mum, thank you somuch for bringing this truth to the entire body.
Your Son, - Moses.
December 17th, 2009 at 9:32 am
Pastor Lola,
What a blessing this topic has been! I believe with all my heart that this is a great message for the body of Christ. Many a father is on the search for what they can do for their child but not what they can be for their child in terms of role modelling and availability. If only more fathers could be there for their children then mothers wouldn’t have to play the role of fatherhood which God ordained for the fathers. YOU HAVE NAILED THE TOPIC AND MAY MANY READ IT AND ACT!